Then there are the Lows!

I wished that I could say it was funny, but that would indicate I still had a sense of humor this afternoon! So I will say instead,   I wrote the "secrets of a happy life" this morning, this afternoon I struggle to pick myself up! We have been waiting with calm and patience for a check to arrive. This afternoon we were looking at it being the deadline for it to come. Well, it most certainly did not! I am so sick and tired of this crap! I am sick and tired of wondering when things are going to get better, sick and tired of wondering how we are going to put groceries in the house, sick and tired wondering how bills are going to be paid! One agency has screwed it up at another agency so that we receive no food stamps or TANF help, leaving us in the most difficult situation we have ever been in. Kind and generous people have helped us out so much and with out there help we would surely be in such trouble. But I am so very, very weary for having to ask or to expect help, it makes my heart and my head hurt! In just about a half an hour I have to go meet Kelly at school, she is going to have to walk to and from school until we figure this out! Damn it makes me so mad! I can only hope that tomorrow the check will arrive! Or that the coats, someone up North has promised to send, comes in. By Friday it is going to be quite cold again! Shawn, ever the optimist took mine and Kelly's coats out of the things I had packed to come down here. He felt we were not going to need them! Guess what! So I have been told that the coats were going to be mailed! I have extremely low optimism that they will be mailed any time this week. Or any time next for that matter! I wish I could tell you I am handling things well today, that would not be the truth! Kate Lynn stays busy reading. Shawn has stayed to himself pretty much the past few days. He prefers to sleep the day away! Me, I am going to try and keep my mouth shut! My only way to cope is to clean, which is ridiculous! There is nothing left to clean! I usually walk, today I can't keep the tears from flowing, so rather than make a spectual out of myself, I will stay in! After Kelly comes home, she will shut herself up in her room, her way of coping lately! I wish we could get a break, a real and honest break!